I want to see the sea,
To be upon the hot sands
And gaze out from the land
At blue-green eternity.

I want to see the sea
And hear its many sounds:
Waves, gulls, wind…all around
Is oh so much beauty.

I want to see the sea,
But before I go,
There’s one thing I want to know:
Would you come with me?


Just a little something I wrote. Something seems wrong with the last stanza, though, but I can't put my finger on it. Also, I haven't actually been to the beach in about three years, so if I got anything wrong, please tell me.

I like it :)
I'm not much of a poet myself so I can't really give any worthy constructive criticism on this, but I liked it nonetheless.

Well, I'm glad you liked it, then.

I like it. The third line in the third stanza, may be a tad long, and makes the last line seem abrupt, but that's just me.

The best part about the beach imo, at least in Australia, is if you're running on a hot, breezy day, you get little bits of sand in your teeth that you can crunch around just before you dive in the water :)

EDIT: What's a WIP? <__>

Work in progress.